On the Rat City Rollergirls website, one quote in particular stands out. Tucked away between an explanation of their somewhat unusual name, Rat City, and a fairly lengthy explanation of the rules of Roller Derby, is a short statement about the sport itself.

This is a real sport … This is the real deal. And we play for keeps.

In a society where World Wrestling Entertainment still has viewers, despite being closer to a reality TV show than a sport, it can be easy to forget what real competition looks like.

Lucky for everybody who’s sick of hearing about Tiger Woods banging East Coast gold diggers (none of whom are as hot as his wife), a couple of ladies down in White Center are bringing the fire back to competitive sports. They are known as the Rat City Rollergirls, and they mean business.

Roller derby is a fairly complex sport. The short story is that one player from each team (known as the jammer) can score points for their team by lapping members of the other team. All the non-jammers (either pivots or blockers) skate in a pack together, and attempt to help their own jammer pass members of the other team while simultaneously preventing the opposing jammer from passing them.

There are a ton of rules governing the ways that blockers can prevent the other jammer from passing them. I didn’t actually read them, but from what I gather, they are allowed to use their hips, shoulders, and under some circumstances elbows, to make the jammer’s life a little bit harder. So, it’s kind of like hockey, but without a puck. And it’s played by women that I’m pretty sure could tear most hockey players up limb by limb.

Roller Derby traces its origins back to the 1930s when the name itself was trademarked by a traveling group, of professional skaters who would hold skating matches in cities across the US. Gradually expanding its base of popular support, the original form of Roller Derby grew slowly over the next 40 years, but collapsed in the 1970’s. It has since experienced a revival, and in recent years, leagues have been springing up in cities across the country. The Rollergirls were founded in 2004, but the all-star team quickly rose to the top of the national standings by 2007, sweeping the Western Regional Tournament and upstaging the former top-ranked Texas Texecutioners. The league itself has grown steadily ever since.

These ladies, the Rat City Rollergirls, claim the South Seattle suburb of White Center as their home. Apparently, White Center used to be called Rat City, which is where their name came from, although nobody knows why. Theories abound as to where the nickname came from, but in the end, as the website says,

No matter the origin, it’s a pretty badass name. We love it. Meets are held in White Center’s Southgate Skating Center, and apparently the Rollergirls have even adopted a stretch of roadway here.

The league itself is comprised of four teams: Derby Liberation Front, Grave Danger, Sockit Wenches, and Throttle Rockets, with an all-star team (known simply as the Rat City Rollergirls All-Stars) that does all the regional and national-level playing. This all-star team has been at the top of the rankings pretty consistently over the past couple of years. Although they experienced a drop to fourth place in the Western division this year, they will still be a force to contend with this year.

The team is comprised of girls I would not want to run into in a dark alley, and features names like Kitty Kamikaze, Valtron 3000, Drea the Slaya, Wile E. Peyote, and my personal favorite, Sheeza Brickhouse. All that’s missing is a 400-pound woman named Olga, and these ladies would probably be capable of taking out a tank with their roller skates. Portland got nothin’.

These ladies have become the exception to so many of the unwritten rules that society has laid down. They have pretty successfully proven that women can be competitive, despite any evidence to the contrary. They have also proven that girl on girl fights can be pretty brutal (although I still think that the hair-pulling and clawing variety are more entertaining.)

But perhaps most importantly, they have established beyond any shadow of a doubt that women can compete in intense, physical sports that most guys wouldn’t have the balls to go anywhere near. Let’s be honest, I’ve played soccer against guys who look like tanks that can grow Gimli beards, but I would never in a million years go up for a header against Coach Corporal Punishment (again, her real name from the website).

Unfortunately for those guys who might see themselves up to the challenge, the roller derby league is currently only open to women. Tryouts are held semi-regularly, and tryout dates are posted on the website. Other requirements include being over 21, having a current passport or birth certificate, and having valid health insurance (a very important part of the sport, from what I understand). But for those women who fancy themselves capable, the sport has done wonders for its participants. Serving both as an inspiration to feminists everywhere, and as a healthy way to take all their anger out on the world, Roller Derby has become the epitome of what a sport should be — a lifestyle.